"To serve G-d and my country..."

Since my initial post, my musings have peripherally touched upon the topic of serving G-d with happiness.  I have discussed ways to enhance happiness and avoid aspects of life that detract from happiness.  I then hope that once a level of happiness is attained, it will result in a state of being ready to serve G-d (in all the ways discussed here: Ivdu et Hashem bsimcha).

Today, I deliberate on a specific, very important way that I do what G-d wants of me.

I am an עזר כנגדו (ezer kenegdo).  When G-d created woman, He called her the "compatible helper" to man.  On a deeper level, a spiritual companion.

A husband and wife each have this role to and for each other.  One's purpose in marriage is to help and give to the other on a physical, emotional, and spiritual level.  If both spouses embody this principle then they will both receive adequately.  I have worked very hard on attaining this perspective in my marriage.  It did not come naturally to me (does it to anybody???!?!).  I still have a long way to go, but I think that I have finally gotten to the point of thinking of my husband's needs as equal to mine.  Eventually, I would like to feel as though I put his needs above my own.  Realistically, this will not be possible until my children are older and I don't need to take care of myself so that I can be in a place to put their every need before my own.

I digress.

Right now, my role as my husband's helpmate is to support him on the six month journey he commences this week.  It's simultaneously a journey of warfare and a journey of personal character and strength.  He will face challenges and with G-d's help, he will learn and grow as a military officer and as a person.  Throughout this time, I need to be there for him.  Even more importantly, I need to do it b'simcha - with happiness!  Yes, I am back home taking care of three children on my own day in and day out, but I need to infuse this life with as much happiness as possible so that I can maintain the strength that I need to support him in his journey.  I need to serve my husband and my children with happiness.  Through so doing, I indirectly help myself, because it is much more enjoyable to be happy than sad.

I will cry when he leaves.  I am sure of it.  It's about as sure as the sun rising tomorrow morning.  But as those tears fade, they will be replaced by fortification, strength, and a deep happiness that I am given the opportunity to help him do what he needs to do and be who he needs to be.